11/27/2014

When Deer Date

Story Sent in by Natasha:

Edward was over at my family's house for dinner. He and I had been together for almost half a year and everything up until that point had been fine. He was a dentist, I was an assistant city planner. We still had lots to talk about and we always had a good time.

At dinner (with my parents and two sisters) he and I laughed about a silly inside joke we had. When one of my sisters asked, "What's so funny?" we had to go through the awkward dance of explaining it all out to her. Edward did most of the explaining.

The gist of it was that Edward once found four of my sneakers laid out in a two-by-two formation that made him wonder if I was secretly a quadruped, specifically a deer. To prove his point, he had then walked around my apartment with all four sneakers on his hands and feet, pretending to be a deer in sneakers. I realize you had to be there, but it cracked me up at the time and so something he said at dinner reminded me of that and that's why I laughed.

Toward the end of the explanation, I added a few details that seemed completely harmless. "Edward made a truly great deer," or something.

Edward then slammed his fist on the table, making everyone jump. He yelled at me, "Shut up!" then stood up and left the house. I followed him out, but he drove away, clearly not wanting to be followed.

I was a mess and I called him multiple times until he texted me, "NOW WHO'S A DEER?"

And thus ended our relationship.

9 comments:

  1. You shouldn't have made fawn of him

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  2. As my German uncle would say, "That was very Rudolph him"

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  3. He must have been a "ran" deer.

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  4. Should have given him a doe-nut

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  5. The relationship ended just like that? Without even a "Deer John" letter or anything?

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  6. He bucked the trend of a traditional relationship. Guess he decided to go stag.

    ReplyDelete

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