9/11/2014

Silent Hell

Story Sent in by John:

The problem with Cindy was that she barely spoke above a whisper for the entire date. I had to ask her to repeat everything. About midway through dinner, her voice had dropped so low that I eventually gave up on telling her to repeat herself and I just nodded at what she said, regardless of what it might have been.

One thing I did hear was her saying, "I love you, too."

I asked, "Are you talking to me?"

She said, "Yes."

"Oh. I never said I loved you. This is our first date, after all."

She said, "I asked you if you loved me and you nodded."

Oops. I didn't hear her ask that, in my defense. Further, who asks that on a first date? I told her, "I must have misheard you. I think it's too early for me to feel anything like that."

"Oh..." she said, and she went back to her low mumbling. It was just like she was talking to herself in a very low voice, only looking up at me occasionally. She tore her paper napkin into little pieces and tossed them around, like she was throwing herself a crazy party complete with confetti.

When I asked her what she was doing, she mumbled the answer, but I heard it well enough: "Imagining our happy wedding."

I didn't want to be there anymore, so I took care of the check and wished her a goodnight. She mumbled, "Thank you, husband," in response and I hightailed it out of there.

4 comments:

  1. Brrr I got th' willies just from reading that !

    ReplyDelete
  2. Did she also ask your comedian friend to wear a puffy shirt on The Today Show?

    ReplyDelete

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