7/02/2014

But Why Is He Still Single?

Story Sent in by Althea:

At dinner with David, we talked about high school. I mentioned that I was a cheerleader and salutatorian. He told me that he was famous in high school for something else. When I asked him what, he drank down half his glass of Coke and held up a finger. Then, he belched so hard and loud that neighboring tables looked at us. A few chunks of food spattered out of his mouth.

Once he was done, he mock-bowed and said, "Thank you."

I flagged the waitress down that very moment and asked for the check. Once she walked off to retrieve it, David asked, "Er, something I said?"

I said, "Yeah, actually. That ferocious belch you just laid down. Do you remember?"

"What about it?"

The waitress came over with the check and I hurried to pull out my share and leave it on the table. I had no real desire to discuss it with him any further. I stood and said, "Have a good night."

As I left, he grabbed my wrist but didn't say a word. He looked really mad, though. I slammed my wrist toward the table, smashing his hand and making him let go. I hightailed it away and didn't look back.

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