2/05/2014

Shake, Rattle, and Run

Story Sent in by Lisa:

How could I ever forget Douglas? I was a college sophomore when I met him on one of my courses' online message boards. He somehow charmed me all the way from talk of academics to a first date.

We met face-to-face in front of a classroom building and after giving me a huge hug, he asked, "Want to ride on the roller coaster of risk?"

Before I could ask him to elaborate, he grabbed my shoulders and shook me, like he was shaking sand out of a beach towel.

I pulled away and he froze, gave me a look, then grabbed me and shook me again. "Roller coaster of riiiiiissssk!" he barked.

I yanked away a second time and backed off, out of reach. "Douglas!" I said, "That's enough!"

He put his hands on his hips. "I never thought I'd see the day when anyone would have enough of the roller coaster of risk!"

He reached for me a third time, but I backed off too quickly for him and said, "Douglas! Stop!"

He froze again and said, "Fine."

We went out for a quick coffee, but I was sure to leave right afterward, before he could take me on another amusement park ride.

8 comments:

  1. That was a lame roller coaster ride. He could have at least made it a little more realistic!

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  2. That picture looks like the guy is sucking in the soul of the person next to him.

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  3. We went out for a quick coffee

    Looks like he shook some brain cells loose. The plan must have been working!

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  4. I was going to drop in and make some lame-o comment about their campus cafe giving away free cronuts with the coffee - and then saw The Architect's example of roller coaster realism - and after a day of waiting room appointments past hours and then a dead battery in the car and the usual crap -- had the best laugh of the day. Thank you - and pardon me for complimenting you more than once in a week! I will try not to do it again for a while :P

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  5. ^ I receive all compliments with grace and aplomb.

    *does vulger dance while shouting "Yeah bitches!"*

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  6. I can't believe you went through with the date.

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