10/03/2013

No Bones About It

Story Sent in by Rhonda:

"I know a place where real dinosaurs still live," Jeff told me during one of our many silly dating site email exchanges. I thought he was just being funny, and we ultimately made plans to go to dinner together.

However, the night of the date, he called me right before we were due to meet up and said, "I spotted a dinosaur in that spot I told you about. Meet me there?"

I didn't feel like traipsing across the countryside with a guy I didn't really know, so I did my best to convince him to come to dinner.

"But you don't understand!" he said, "Dinosaurs!"

No matter what I said, nothing would make him come meet me, so I gave up and went home. He sent me an email that night, informing me that I missed a great dinosaur hunt. I didn't write him anymore.

He wrote me, though. He sent me photos of dinosaurs that he had probably found with a Google image search and told me, in his emails that he had snapped photos of them on various expeditions. Then he sent me crudely-drawn maps of areas where he said dinosaurs could be found. He circled a city, called "Old Bloodville" on one such map that doesn't even exist. Time went on, I didn't respond to him, but he kept writing me.

One day, about two and a half weeks after our date, he wrote another email to tell me that he had found a cache of dinosaur bones and wanted to send them to me. After he asked a few times and I didn't respond  he stopped writing altogether. I was relieved.

But then I happened upon his new profile. He had 10 photos posted, none of himself, but all of dried bones. His profile, which had once seemed so sane, included phrases like, "I WANT TO SHOW YOU THE BONES, RHONDA" and "THIS IS THE ONLY WAY I CAN MAKE YOU SEE THE BONES."

The bones in his photos looked like he had done a Google image search for "femurs" and while it seriously creeped me out, I did my best to put him out of my mind. Well, until now.

6 comments:

  1. Hey Rhonda, Here is PROOF that I saw dinosaurs! This is me meeting the dinosaurs, and this is me hiding from the dinosaurs I met, and this is 2 dinosaurs I saw having sex!

    Frankly,
    Jeff

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, he wants to show her a bone all right. OP was gonna get the ride of her life!

    ReplyDelete
  3. They call him Barney Rubble, cuz he'll make her bedrock...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Fizziks already made the bone joke. I got nothing. I guess I'll take my old stand-by of linking to an old story.

    Also, for no reason, here is some cake, which has nothing to do with this story.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm glad to see Tourist participating in posts lately. We need some new troll-blood.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Agreed, Lord Chunky Horse needs to feed!

    ReplyDelete

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