8/09/2013

It's True. All Guys Do This.

Story Sent in by Justin:

I had been out with Agnes for no longer than five minutes (we were outside) when she started to sniff as if something smelled rotten. She said to me, "You smell like asparagus. Or man-syrup."

I thought what you're thinking. But still, I asked for clarification just to be sure.

She explained, "You know. Man-syrup. You know."

"Man... syrup? I smell like... eww. That?"

She sniffed my shoulder and said, "Maybe it's just the world that smells like it, I guess. It smells really bad."

At dinner, she sniffed up a storm and said at varying times, "This restaurant smells like man-syrup," "This seltzer smells like man-syrup," and "This pasta smells like man-syrup." It was the only topic that she seemed interested in. I didn't smell a thing.

When the date was over, I went to hug her and she said, "No. I don't want the smell on me. Did you spritz yourself with it? I heard it's something guys do."

For the record, I didn't ever do anything like that. But it didn't matter. We didn't go out anymore.

18 comments:

  1. Maybe she had some cum under her nose. Did she smell like man syrup?

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  2. ^ Howie strikes again...

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  3. Man syrup, eh? Sounds downright Canadian! SmallCityGirl, can you shed some light on this?

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  4. Geeze, OP, what's a girl gotta do to get you to blow a hot load of your man syrup on her face? Agnes was clearly letting you know she wanted you to give her a facial and you try to give her a hug? Any REAL man would have taken the hint and given Agnes what she was begging for. Amirite, fellas?

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  5. Thank you Devil. One of my best dates EVAH!!11!!1 happened when I was positively starving for jizz, and being a lady, I hinted to my date " Is that man syrup I smell?". Like a
    lion of a man he'd stood on the dinning table in the middle of the restaurant and started beaning off like a lawn sprinkler. You may want to write this down OP.

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  6. She was hurtin' for a squirtin'...

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  7. ^ She was a ho... for sho.

    And yes, as a Canadian lady in a small city, I am familiar with all syrups. While lighter in colour, the man syrup exhibits a delightfully pungent aroma and may vary in texture and consistency. It can be enjoyed on food or as a skin rejuvenating cream. A true Canadian favourite alongside the majestic maple syrup, enjoyed by men & women, young & old.

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  8. You can buy our delicacy here... http://www.wellnesswarehouse.com/shop/?var=5189#page=page-1

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  9. Ugh, how the f does fizziks post those awesome links? Feeling like a n00b right now...

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  10. @ SMC - ha, great find, I love it! C'mere ya lug.

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  11. As a dedicated Spermivore you can buy our delicacy cook book here.
    http://www.lulu.com/shop/fotie-photenhauer/natural-harvest-a-collection-of-semen-based-recipes/paperback/product-20052760.html

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  12. Aww yiss, love from Fizziks!

    And glad to see I'm not the only one without Fizziks magic link-posting powers. All this man syrup talk has me hoping my weekend is as good as the one these kids are having: http://i.minus.com/iBprKF3nPlcTV.gif

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  13. SCG, now that's what I call beaning off like a lawn sprinkler, nice. I always like to keep a small jar of man syrup from whoever I've sucked off recently in my purse. It's a great topping for almost anything from meat pies to ice cream & cake.

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  14. Op's date said he smelled bad but he still had dinner with her? What a waste of time.

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  15. I feel like this date should be made into a music video!

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  16. Wow, Tanette FTW! I love how this both insults Agnes while at the same time it makes perfect logical sense. :-)

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  17. Once she got too cheeky, you ask her if there's cum in her nose. Ho.

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