5/23/2013

Blown Away

Story Sent in by Melissa:

Ray asked me twice by email if I wanted to go to a firing range for our first time out together. I politely declined both times (I figure that a couple with weapons in their hands would be more appropriate for far later in the relationship) and he agreed to go out to the beach with me, followed by lunch.

It was a chilly day for a swim, but not so for a walk. Despite informing Ray by email that I wouldn't be swimming that day, he showed up to the beach in a bathing suit, and was ticked off when I didn't.

"Where's your bikini?" he asked, bluntly.

"I'm not going swimming," I informed him for the second time in 24 hours, "The water's freezing."

"Let's go to the shooting range."

I said, "We can take a nice walk on the beach, instead–"

"But not go swimming. What's the point?"

I thought for a moment, then said, "There's more of a point to both of us enjoying the sun and sand than only one of us enjoying shooting."

He begrudgingly joined me for the beach walk, but already I was feeling that any more time spent with this guy would be a big mistake. He was relatively well-behaved for our hour-long walk, and then I asked him if he wanted to go to lunch.

He asked, "Can we stop at the shooting range for a minute on the way? I promise you'll love it–"

"No. Let's just go to lunch."

"At the shooting range? You know, they have a slop kitchen–"

"No!"

He said, "Dumbest date ever. Fine. Let's go to lunch."

I was ready to call it quits then and there but then he said, "I won't mention the range again. I'm sorry. I was just really in the mood to go this week."

I thought, water under the bridge. Let's just do lunch.

At lunch, he took my hand on the table and shaped it into a gun-holding position. He said, "That's how you'd hold this type of gun, that's how you'd hold that type of gun..." and so on.

I didn't follow most of it, and I took my hand away and said, "Can we seriously talk about anything else?"

He laughed and said, "Sorry, but once you get me going, nothing can make me shut up about guns."

I replied, "A gun would."

That made him shut up, but good. He sat back, said, "Whatever," and we made smalltalk for the rest of the date, which was honestly the best part of the whole thing.

I was surprised when he contacted me for a second date, but he shouldn't have been surprised when I declined.

14 comments:

  1. I think the OP was the bad date here. Ray clearly wanted to show off his gun shooting prowess to get her into a sexy time frame of mind and then impress her with a hot bowl of shit at the slop kitchen but she was just too uptight. Bitches always be wantin' to eat at restaurants where you can't hear gun fire in the background.

    I predict the OP will die alone. Mainly because Ray will shoot her because he's really in the mood to shoot something.

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  2. Oh snap! Did the OP just threaten to shoot her date?! She went gangsta on his ass!

    Some guys have this fantasy that if a woman holds a gun and starts squeezing off rounds, she'll get turned on and want to have sex (thanks American Beauty). Could be true but I doubt it.

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  3. Actually, Architect, I've taken several dates shooting, and it's always produced favorable results. Shooting is fun, and some girls enjoy doing something new and "dangerous." And when they have a cute and attentive guy guiding them, all the better! I'm sure Tanette would just go bonkers! ;-)

    However, on two separate occasions, I've shown a girl my gun collection (at THEIR request!), and think it freaked them out a bit... "it's not you it's me, blah blah"

    The key is to have them actually SHOOT the guns, and only 2-3 at a time... :-)

    And yes, the guy in the story was a total tool...

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  4. I don't understand why the OP continued on with the date after it became apparent that it would be a "mistake" to spend time with the guy. Why go on a one hour walk, lunch, and be uncomfortable? If its not working out, politely find an excuse to end the date and move on. If its meant to work out, it will. If not, you've said yourself a lot of wasted time and energy. This applies to the OP's date as well.

    I'm not a gun fan myself, but as long as they regulated/licensed, go for it. Clay shooting/fire arm range shooting I think could be fun. Especially big guns, when you have armed criminals running around, GOOD MEMORIES!!!!!!!

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  5. This reminds me of a quote I've seen floating around: “Women are afraid of meeting a serial killer. Men are afraid of meeting someone fat.” — When Strangers Click, a 2011 documentary about online dating.

    The point is that when you're dating someone for the first time you're not just trying to figure out if your personalities are compatible. You are also trying to suss out if this person is a rapist or a murder. The OP's date couldn't respect a 'No' or stop talking about guns. Yeah, he shouldn't have been surprised at all when she said no to a second date.

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  6. @ KatieGirl - Humm, why would the OP stick around and continue the date even after she had decided it was going nowhere? *cough DINNER WHORE cough* Sorry, must be coming down with something.

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  7. I'm just amused that this guy had a day full of bikinis and guns planned, and lobbied hard for it... Can't say he doesn't have vision...

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  8. @ Steve - Excellent point! I wonder if I can talk my girl into that? She can carry a piece while wearing her two piece.

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  9. ^ Tell her that wearing a bikini increases accuracy exponentially.

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  10. I always wear my bikini to the shooting range.

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  11. Steve, my first thought when I read this was that I wish Steve would take me shooting. I think that would be such an hot sexy date. I own a pair of dear antler earrings given to me by my friend who hunts. I love them I shot a rifle once at church camp. It was hella cool. I would do it again. Anyway I agree that OP shoulda left when she wasn't having fun. Oh well.

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  12. Deer antler earrings. Sorry.

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  13. Actually, it is kinda true.
    Even shooting my M4 paintball gun gets em kinda hot.

    Probably why I have a target setup right outside my bedroom. Women are always very reluctant to try it, but once they do they seem to enjoy it a lot.

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