1/10/2013

Rock Tease

Story Sent in by Erin:

Laura and I were out on date number four. It was at a point where we had kissed a few times and when we spoke of the future, it was in terms of each other. It gave me butterflies to think about, at the time. She was really terrific. At least, up until that night.

There was a dingy biker bar she had wanted to try. I had never been to it (I'll admit it: I was scared to) but I wanted to impress her, so I suggested we go there for our date.

She loved the atmosphere in there, and I'll admit that I also had a good time. We played pool (and won a game) against these two huge guys and even fit in a few games of darts. The music was great, the drinks didn't stop coming, guys flirted with us, and it was fun.

Laura had a couple too many drinks, and by the end of the evening, it became increasingly clear that I'd be driving her home, which wasn't at all a problem. I nudged her to leave, but she kept saying, "I'm having fun! Why do you want to leave?"

She wound up throwing up in the bathroom, and I waited there alongside her and held her hair up as she did so. Finally, when it seemed as though all of her stomach contents had been thoroughly emptied, I led her outside, toward my car.

She tore away from me and ran for the back of the building. I followed her to a sort of cliff side, with rock piles and bushes growing out at all odd angles.

I asked her if she was okay, and then she stumbled into me and said, "I know why you wanted to leave. Come on..." She kissed me and pulled me down, toward the rocks.

I tugged away. "Not here." Someone might've caught us, but more concerning was the fact that there wasn't a safe place to lie down. There were rocks everywhere, and I didn't want either of us to be hurt.

"Come on, come on, come on..." she kept cajoling, and I kept telling her that I wanted to leave. She said, "Not until we're done, back here. Let's go. Slice me... slice me..."

I didn't know what "slice me" meant (I chalked it up to the alcohol) and I kept saying to her that I wanted to go, and that I'd put her to bed. She was in a really bad state, and looked like she'd throw up again at any moment.

I went inside the bar and found one of the guys who had been flirting with us. I explained the situation to him, and he and a friend followed me outside to where she sat among the rocks. When we found her there, she was humming a song and her hands were bleeding.

They helped her up and into my car, where I wrapped a towel around her hands. I thanked them and drove her home. Her wounds weren't so bad that a hospital would've been necessary, but I dragged her into her own bathroom and cleaned her up and put her to bed.

I crashed on her couch and stayed through the next day. She woke up around three in the afternoon and asked me how she made it home, the prior night. I explained everything to her, and instead of thanking me for taking care of her, she told me to leave. I did, and thenceforth, my future plans no longer included any talk of her.

6 comments:

  1. Erin and Laura - If this was truly the fourth date, you'd have already moved in together, right? We all know lesbians drive a U-haul to the second date... ;-)

    And when she wanted you to 'slice' her, I think she was requesting a 'scissoring' session!

    But seriously, alcohol brings out the worst in some people, and it seems like you two had vastly different personalities, you being much more logical and practical. I'm sure you wouldn't want to be her babysitter every time you went out, because that gets old REAL fast.

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  2. She wanted to scissor on the rocks - all you needed was some paper to put down!

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  3. But rock beats scissors.
    Of course unless paper covers rock?

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  4. being a card carrying lesbian, i am confused as to how you made it to a pg-13 4th date anyway, seemingly breaking the cardinal rule of 3rd date homo boning (or scissoring as steve seems to prefer). i's right there in the handbook, Chapter 2, Subsection C, right before the rule about lesbian bed death commencing on or about month 3. i am sure neither of these dykes has received her complimentary toaster.

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  5. I was guessing it was scissor-related also, just put in a more gruesome way.

    That's lucky date story #2 this week where people wanted to makeout directly after upchuck. Whatever happened after each of those events, I'm oblivious to. I can't think of anything else after.

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  6. Mmmmmm, barf flavored lesbian make out session! How did the OP ever resist?

    ReplyDelete

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