8/31/2012

A Dance with Wagons

Story Sent in by Louis:

Karleen, who was a paralegal, and I went to a weekend street fair on our first date. All progressed just fine, although she was a little quiet. We walked past various vendors: artisans, bakers, shawarma carts, and food wagons.

It was around lunchtime when we passed one vendor who sold fried dough. Karleen asked if I wanted some and said she'd pay for it. I thanked her for her generosity and took her up on her offer.

After Karleen paid, the vendor handed her two plates of fried dough over his food wagon. Karleen took them both and walked a few steps away from the vendor and I followed her. She then turned to me, tipped one of the plates, and I watched as the fried dough hit the ground.

"Oh, no!" I said.

Karleen said, "That one was going to be yours. Um... yeah."

I pointed to the one that she still carried on her plate. "We can split that one."

She gave me a big frown. "I kind of wanted one to myself. I'm really hungry. How about I buy you a sandwich?"

I said, "Thanks for offering, but you don't have to buy me a sandwich. Don't worry about it. I'll go grab something–"

"No!" she said, "I, uh, I feel bad. Let me buy you a sandwich."

She insisted, so I thanked her and we visited a wagon that had handmade, plastic-wrapped, pre-made sandwiches. Karleen asked me which one I wanted, I pointed it out, she paid for it, and I thanked her again. Then, she walked away with it. I reached for it, but she held it away from me and asked, "What are you doing?"

"Reaching for my sandwich."

She said, "You want this one on the ground, too?"

"What are you talking about?"

She replied, "You want this sandwich, you'll have to ask me nicely for it."

I said, "I already thanked you for it. More than once."

She snapped, "Don't take that tone, jerk-off. I'm a lawyer. I don't have to take shit from you. I want you to beg me for it."

I said, "I would if you were a lawyer, but you're just a paralegal."

Ooh, that set her mad. She threw the sandwich to the ground and pounded away from me. I guessed that the date was over, but the deliciousness had just begun, as the sandwich, unlike the unfortunate fried dough, came wrapped in plastic, and although it was a little flat, I was able to recover and eat it. And thus a small victory was won.

8 comments:

  1. You didn't go home with her. I'd say that's at least a moderate-sized victory.

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  2. Two fried dough stories in the same week... what're the odds?

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  3. She might have been a lawyer -- I know several paralegals who have law degrees (they either can't pass the bar or choose to be a paralegal). Still doesn't excuse her bitchy behavior though.

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  4. Sounds like she's a closet dom hoping to find a sub without giving herself away.

    On an unrelated note, any bets on how long Jared can keep up the Game of Thrones references?

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  5. I hope he does for a week or so...

    And I hope even more he's not building up to some Jaime & Cercei reference O_o .

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