Brotherly Love

Story Sent in by Kris:

I met Natalie online. We traded pictures, emails, and a couple of short phone calls. Eventually, I asked her if she wanted to meet. She did, and we picked out a restaurant.

When I arrived there, I told the host that I was meeting someone. A guy who didn't look older than 18, with bloodshot eyes, and about my height, approached me. He gave me a smile and said, in Natalie's voice, "Hi. I'm Natalie." He then cleared his throat and continued, in a deeper voice, "But my real name's Nick."

"Hello, Nick," I said.

He leaned in close to me and said, "I think I know your older brother. You don't want to sleep together, do you?"

I don't have an older brother. I replied, "No thanks, Nick."

He said, "Thought I'd ask. Know where I can get some action?"

I replied, as politely as possible, "Try Gruber's. It's a bar about a half-mile down Main."

He nodded, walked past me, then turned around to say, "You have my number, just in case."

"Bye, Nick."

He shrugged and left the restaurant.

Nowadays, it's only after I've related that experience that online women understand why I always ask them, "You're really a woman, right?"