Story Sent in by Scott:
Vanessa and I were out on a walk after a first-date lunch when she turned to me and said, "I'm pregnant."
She didn't look pregnant, and I asked her, "For how long?"
She replied, "For just a few weeks."
I said, "I appreciate you letting me know. I probably wouldn't want to pursue a relationship with someone who's pregnant, though."
She stopped walking and asked, "Are you serious? I'm pregnant. It's not like I have AIDS. Just wait nine months and then I won't be pregnant anymore."
I said, "Right. Then you'll have a child."
She said, "And that makes me horrible?"
Before I could respond, she opened her mouth wide and made a loud sound, like the clearing of her throat. She did it over and over.
"What are you doing?" I asked her.
"Trying to puke on you," she replied, "I've been puking non-stop since I got pregnant."
I backed away from her and she went on, "It's only fair. You think I'm diseased or something, so I might as well play along, right?"
"Right. Bye." I hurried away from her, and didn't hear from her until over a month later, when she wrote me an email to let me know that she hadn't been pregnant: she had just ill with a stomach bug. She also called me all sorts of nasty names, but at that point, it didn't much matter to me.