1/26/2012

You Could Just Date a Rock

Email Sent in by Connor:

Hi Connor.

Thank you for your inbox message. You ask a lot of good questions. My question to you is: could you survive a relationship with no intercourse ever? We can still breed but I will have your semen artificially inserted while I am under general anesthesia. Once you get to know me better I will explain all the whys and whats but I figure that before we move into knowing each other tenderly you should know this upfront and center. If I see a single sp3rm at all then I don't care if we've been together months, years, decades, centuries, or millennia. Sperm=breakup.

Terri

7 comments:

  1. So after we'd be dating for 2,000+ years, you'll still hold sperm against me? Bummer.

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  2. Now THAT is some good information to get upfront before you waste any more time.

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  3. I don't see anything wrong with this message at all. It's actually very considerate and honest of her to get a huge deal-breaker like this out at the beginning, and she even points out compromise options for people who really want to have children (assuming that they don't mind having zero intercourse). WOuld you prefer for her to wait till the 3rd date before mentioning she will never sleep with you?

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  4. I dunno, seems like a foolproof way to weed out all those filthy men who just want to get the sperms all over everything!

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  5. You just don't want to SEE a sperm...?

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  6. If you don't want to see a single sperm ya better keep your lips wrapped tightly around my dick and keep swallowing til your mouth is dry...or are BJ's outta the question too?

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  7. So she doesn't want to see sperm? So what's the problem? Just make sure you've got no microscopes in the house and you're all set. No problem at all...

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