12/21/2011

The Woolly Bandit

Story Sent in by Dave:

Monica and I had been out on one date already, and for our second date, I invited her over to my apartment, as I had the idea to cook her dinner. After dinner, the plan was to go out for karaoke.

She came over, I served her the meal, and all was well. She excused herself to use my bathroom, at one point, for what seemed to be a while, but then she returned, assured me that everything was okay, and I thought no more of it.

We went out to sing, had a great time, and returned home to our respective houses. For all intents and purposes, a good date.

When I entered my bathroom, I discovered several used shaving cartridges in my bathtub, complete with accompanying piles of shaving cream, hairs, and shaving scum. It looked like a woolly mammoth had shaved in my bathtub.

It struck me as the height of rudeness or absent-mindedness (or both) but I tried to put on a good sense of humor about it. I wrote her an email to let her know that I had a great time on the date, and to ask her, "Why did you shave in my tub?"

She wrote back that she also had a great time, but firmly denied shaving in my bathtub at all. Now dear friends, I know for a fact that the perpetrator wasn't myself, and I was the only person who lived in my apartment. The bathroom was clean before she arrived, and I didn't go into it until after the date was over. No one else, with the exception of the superintendent, had access to my place. Case closed. Fess up.

"I didn't. I wouldn't shave in your bathroom. Sorry!" she wrote.

I was confused and turned off by the whole affair, mostly as I was the one stuck cleaning up the mess, and so I wasn't in a rush to contact her much after that. The next day, I bought a new pack of razor cartridges and did my best to forget about the whole thing.

She contacted me again, a few days later: "Hey, so are we hanging out again? I had a great time with you the other night."

I wrote back, "I'm sorry. I'm still a bit put off by the shaving in my tub. If it wasn't you, then someone must have broken in, shaved, and just left everything else in place. Weird."

She wrote back, "I didn't shave in your tub. Moving on…"

I'm sure she was just humiliated by the whole thing, but I just couldn't get past it. Not so much because of the shaving part, but because she lied about having done it. I ended things, and since then, have taken to hiding my shaving supplies whenever another guest has come to call.

60 comments:

  1. My interpretation is that she almost never sleeps with somebody on the second date (so she didn't bother shaving her legs, wearing pantyhose instead) but you were so charming during dinner she felt like maybe that would be the night, so she wanted to make sure her legs wouldn't be furry. It may have seemed rude to shave in your tub without asking, but she estimated (probably quite accurately) that you wouldn't mind a little extra clean-up if you were going to get lucky.

    Then, at some point during the night, the plan changed. Maybe you said something that changed her mind, maybe she was worried that you would judge her if she slept with you "too soon", maybe the date just didn't have an opportunity to transition naturally to the bedroom (ie, you dropped her off at her house and mentioned you had an early night, so she couldn't use the "invite you in for a drink" pretext).

    Then, you confronted her about the hair, which was a tactical error on your part. I mean, seriously, what could she say? A girl who doesn't shave her legs on the second date because she thinks there's absolutely zero chance of sleeping with you that night is probably pretty shy; she's not going to come out and say "I shaved my legs in your tub because I thought I was going to sleep with you." Denial was her only option and instead of letting it go and letting her have this one, you pushed the topic, which was unwise.

    I'm not saying you're a bad person OP - you did what any reasonable person would do. I'm just saying that I think you get the impression she was crazy when really she was just a shy girl who was perhaps a little naive about dating.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Doesn't really answer why she didn't bother to clean up or try to hide what she had done at all.

    If she was truly shy I don't think she would have left all of the evidence in the tub for anyone to see - what if he had gone in there during the date? If she had in fact planned to sleep with him, don't you think that would have derailed any such plans if he noticed before she left?

    ReplyDelete
  3. "I believe 'shaved' is the expression?"

    OP dropped the ball here. If women want to create a failsafe in which they won't sleep with a guy (even if they REALLY want to), they'll intentionally forgo shaving their legs.

    She came over, changed her mind, and wanted you to bang her into next week.

    She thought you wouldn't noticed the razors, or wouldn't even care, because you had just gotten the lay of your life.

    Or, you know, she's just batshyt krayzee...

    ReplyDelete
  4. All of the "no shave to behave" makes sense, but the not cleaning up part? That's weird.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I gotta agree with Wolfie here. She decided that she was ready to romp, and for whatever reason it didn't work out on the date.

    She probably figured that running the bathtub while in a guy's apartment on a second date would sound weird, and the overt implication of shaving her legs for sex right there in his apartment was not in her playbook or nature. I'm going to go ahead and guess that after the sexy time, she was planning on getting back to it and cleaning up. After all, if you just got laid on a second date, are you going to go into the bathroom and get mad about leg hairs in the tub?

    Basically, she wasn't ready to give it up, but you charmed her into wanting it. She did a quick job to be ready for it, but it didn't happen. Then in the end, you went and embarrassed her, and she was still interested in seeing you.

    "Why did you shave in my tub?" How dense can you be?

    ReplyDelete
  6. ^ What he said.

    You seem like a nice guy, OP, so I'll try not to rub it in TOO much, but this story makes you seem about as dumb as a box full of rocks. Not only do you talk yourself out of second-date sex with a fairly innocent girl, but you ALSO misinterpret her actions so completely that you dumb your way out of any FUTURE sex or relationship with her. And on TOP of that, now you lock your shaving supplies away so that ANY future innocent girls who decide they want to sleep with you early don't get the opportunity?!? Dumb, OP. Dumb, dumb, dumb. It's lucky for you that you're charming, because in other respects, Darwin clearly doesn't favor you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. thats what all women do when they want to get laid, they shave in a strangers bathtub and leave hairy souvenirs,the guys leaving comments here are longtime singles or just plain desperate, deluding themselves that crazy or weird behavior must be a prelude to sex.theyll even concoct essay length explanations convincing themselves as much.

    ReplyDelete
  8. apparently in the opinion of the guys commenting here the op is Dumb, dense and dropped the ball. Truth is desperate guys will ignore or put up with absolutely anything to get laid.

    ReplyDelete
  9. If her legs and bush were SO VERY hairy that she had to shave herself right there and then because she was going to give it up to you that night, then you are lucky this didn't work out!

    This Neanderthal doesn't care much for personal hygiene. I usually groom prior to going out. The fact that she didn't care to do it ahead of time shows a lack of cleanliness. The fact that she did it at your place and didn't bother to clean up shows a lack of respect and more!

    Going down on this chick would probably find yourself gasping for air...unless you also noticed used cans of air freshener in your garbage too?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Well "Bottomendbliss", if you're so much more clever than us, can YOU think of a logical explanation for her behavior?

    Generally, your posts don't seem very intellectual in nature, but I think even you ought be able to come up with a better explanation than "Beetches be krazay!" Won't you please make the effort and try to think about this just a LITTLE harder? For me? ::puppy dog eyes::

    Granted, sometimes people ARE just crazy. But if you make that general assumption every time a woman does something you don't understand, you've probably talked yourself out of a lot of "bliss."

    ReplyDelete
  11. He should have invited himself to her place and shaved his legs in her tub then deny the whole thing.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I think a logical explanation of her behavior could be one of a great number of things, and I also think that some of you guys are reading too much into your clever ideas. If her legs were so disgustingly hairy, couldn't she have simply not owned a razor or not had any shaving cream? That doesn't sound like one day's problem. I knew two girls that would never buy any shaving cream at all, and would just bum some off their man to shave their legs. Or what if she just, you know, forgot to do that before leaving the house? In either case she'd have every reason to deny it, and we don't have to work off the assumption that she changed her mind about sex with no clues in the story to support that.

    Also, as far as OP wasting the opportunity for a second date, I don't know that I'd want to go out with some lying bitch who won't even clean up after herself, but maybe that's just me. Really, Howie put it best. She was just rude, and didn't respect the OP in the slightest by leaving such a mess.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Sorry, third date. My bad.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Occam's Razor - the simplest explanation is usually the best. Ask yourself a simple question: "Why would a girl want to shave her legs in such a hurry that it needed to be done at her dates house?" and the only logical answer that follows is sex. When you consider that this answer ALSO fits perfectly with all her other behavior, which story is simpler?

    1. Monica shaved her legs to have sex with the OP, but he dropped her off at her house after kareoke and didn't pick up on her hints that she wanted him to come inside?

    OR

    2. Monica is not only a compulsive liar but ALSO does not own a razor and instead manipulates her dates into inviting her over so that she can shave in their tubs?

    And yeah, in an ideal world, Monica should have had the foresight to clean up after herself in case her plan to hook up with the OP didn't work... but then again, if she had that kind of foresight she'd have shaved at her own house in the first place. Preparedness is obviously not her niche.

    ReplyDelete
  15. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I think the simplest explanation is that she didn't shave herself before the date, because that's the simplest explanation. Probably because she forgot, or was busy. Really, I think you're stretching on the sex.

    I mean, after all, your first explanation would mean that Monica was undecided about sex until she went to dinner with the OP, was so blown away by the meal that she decided that she'd give him some sex later that night, and so she went off to shave her legs. If Monica had already decided that she wanted to have sex with the OP, wouldn't she have shaved her legs beforehand? If she forgot to shave her legs beforehand, why not assume it's because she just forgot, and not because she was waiting to see how things turned out before pre-sex shaving occurred?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Whether or not the OP is an idiot or she wanted to hook up with him...
    ..he said there were *several* used shaving cartridges. As a girl, with you know, girl bits, I have never been so overgrown that it required several shaving new razors to get the job done. Usually one new one does everything.
    Was his date a woolly mammoth?

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh, and then there's the explanation that she shaved because she doesn't like her legs being itchy on a date. That seems like the actual simplest explanation.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Is it possible that there is no logic or reason behind this? I can understand the desire to want to make sense of some things in life, but let's not invent rationalizations where none exist... some people just do things that don't make any sense, and even if you understand why they did them, they're not necessarily going to make any more sense then.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I'm not sure why everyone's trying to come up with a reasonable, logical explanation. Hasn't anyone learned & been completely jaded by this site?..

    ReplyDelete
  21. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  22. OP missed his shot at stroking the hypoallergetic meow-meow...

    ReplyDelete
  23. Oh, and for those who don't know, I am referencing this fine ABCD submission:

    http://www.abadcaseofthedates.com/2011/07/i-present-you-with-door-its-that-way.html

    ReplyDelete
  24. This is how I visualized this story unfolding:

    I'm going to guess that she either forgot to shave her legs, ran out of time before the date or simply didn't think that OP would see her legs that night. But then she got there, things were going well and Furry Lady thought that the night looked promising... She probably figured that she could shave herself really quickly and get away with it, but then she ended up making a big mess in the process. Having taken too long in the bathroom already, she probably figured that OP would be able to hear the running water so she hurried out and left the mess behind her, hoping for the best. Whether she was planning to come back later and try to fix things later is pretty hard to speculate about.

    Now, lying about being responsible for that horrendous mess in OP's bathroom was childish. Maybe she hoped that he'd get the hint that she was embarrassed and didn't want to talk about it, but OP obviously did not get it. She was better off admitting to having done it. I do know quite a few girls who won't admit to doing really silly things (even when it's obvious that they do it) because they don't want guys to know about it "for sure", so my thinking is that she has that kind of mentality as well.

    I don't blame OP for not pursuing things with this girl (the blatant lie didn't help things), but it's kind of a shame that he didn't get the hint that she most likely did that to get ready for sex.

    ReplyDelete
  25. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Pinkerton, my speculated scenario is more complicated than it needs to be, because psychology is one of my passions. There are any number of reasons she could have not shaved (S's example above points out several good ones).

    If you want to deconstruct to the most basic level, my analysis is pretty simple:

    1. Monica didn't shave before the date (for whatever reason);
    2. Monica decided at some point during the date that she was going to sex up the OP (again, for any possible number of reasons) so she shaved, for obvious reasons;
    3. Somewhere between shaving and the end of the night, things did not go as Monica planned.

    It's hard for any pragmatic person to argue that this is an overly complex or improbable scenario

    ReplyDelete
  27. Monica isn't entirely blameless, and she certainly shouldn't have lied, but I think she got caught in a no-win scenario: Should she try to clean up and be perceieved as a rude weirdo for taking forever in the bathroom, or leave it be and deal with it later? Clearly her choice didn't turn out so well, but the other option may well have been even worse. OP, sometimes it's best just to let something go. There really aren't any winners in this story.

    ReplyDelete
  28. I just can't see this mess as being that "horrendous." Some shaving cream and hair is easy to clean up. Grab it with some toilet paper and flush if you don't want to run the bath water.

    It's stupid that she didn't clean it up, but it's also stupid that he was *so* offended by it.

    ReplyDelete
  29. I'm a little confused at how Monica allegedly doing it to have sex makes her more innocent. She couldn't just wait 'till the next date? Was she really that desperate?

    ReplyDelete
  30. @ TacoDave:

    Well, I find it hard to believe that the mess could have been all that terrible, but some people are more on the neat freak side than I am. I've witnessed my sister scream at my dead for dirtying her bathroom mat, and suffered the screaming anger myself when I accidentally stepped on the damned mat and folded one of its corners over. So yeah, I guess some people can be hyper sensitive about keeping things clean and what may or may not outrage them.

    Plus stuff seems grosser when you're caught by surprise by it and it's not your own hair filthyfying your tub, I guess.

    ReplyDelete
  31. *dead = dad. My poor dad is still very much alive, and hopefully things will stay that way for quite a few more years.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Baku, I was the one who posited the "more innocent" hypothesis, and the reason why is because people who follow the "No shave to behave" rule tend to have a more innocent view of how dating works. But as people pointed out since then, there could be any number of reasons she didn't shave (maybe she ran out of time, maybe she wasn't impressed by the OP till later... hell, maybe his fly was open and she caught a glimpse of his massive penis). So I fully retract the "innocence" remark. My underlying point is simply that she shaved with the intent of having sex with him, since that's the only logical reason a woman would decide it was suddenly that important to immediately shave down there.

    ReplyDelete
  33. ^^ So sorry to hear about your dead, S!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Given the fact that she denied the whole thing on top of leaving all that crap in his tub, I don't feel that she was very innocent at all.

    In my mind the simplest explanation is that she went to the bathroom normally, noticed he had his shaving supplies out, decided (for whatever reason) to shave her legs, and left a mess because she didn't give a shit.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Ok, whoa - PEOPLE. I don't care what reason this girl had to shave her "legs" or whatever it is that she shaved in a his apartment - IT'S WEIRD! Am I the only one who thinks this poor guy had every right to feel totally weirded out by this girl? #1 - From his story it doesn't sound like there were only one or two little hairs - it sounds like she decided to forgo the feminist movement in his bathroom #2 - don't you know its gross to use someones razor you barely even know? #3 - if you are going to shave yourself in a strangers bathroom (2nd date equals almost stranger) - would'nt you look around and CLEAN UP!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Mediator:
    Quite the opposite! Not giving a shit would actually be a reason NOT to shave. People don't just spontaneously groom for 20 min out of apathy. They do it because they care. In this case, she was concerned about how her legs looked and implicitly that he might see them.

    When I read this, it seemed pretty obvious that she was thinking about sex. Like I said, just ask why she suddenly cared how her legs looked. The answer: Because she figured he might end up seeing them. Otherwise it would be pointless.
    And BTW, shaving to behave is a fairly well known practice. It even came up on a How I Met Your Mother episode. The mess may have been because she may have felt rushed to finish( since it was taking so long) Either way, she seemed ready to give him more than enough to make up for it.

    Secondly, of course, she denied it. He is putting her in a tough place. It's embarrassing and no possible good could have come from it. He knew it was her and that is not something that ANYONE would readily want to admit to. What did he honestly expect to hear? The OP shows low social intelligence by pushing the issue and, even more by not realizing it was a sign of sexual interest. I mean, here is a woman ready to sleep with him and he is looking to scold her.

    As far as quantity is concerned, consider the possibility that the OP was exaggerating the mess a little. I would be an absurd amount of hair for anybody. Plus he seems fairly anal.

    What you have here isn't a bad date story so much as the OP missing the point

    ReplyDelete
  37. ^But I deny the fact that she was interested in sex. I believe that she just wanted to use someone else's supplies in order to get the job done (given the opportunity) - and because she didn't care, she left everything behind.

    ReplyDelete
  38. I'm totally with Mediator here. I think it's just as likely that she was sitting at the table, didn't like the way her legs felt in whatever clothes she was in, and wasn't that interested in the OP so she shaved while in the bathroom and left a mess.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Pinkerton & Mediator - if she wasn't that interested in the OP, then why would she seem that interested in another date? He didn't reach out to her - SHE actually contacted HIM to try to arrange another get-together. That would seem to highly contradict your "doesn't give a crap" story.

    ReplyDelete
  40. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  41. 325081aa-d193-11e0-9f0f-000bcdcb5194

    "Here is a woman ready to sleep with him and he is looking to scold her"

    If she wanted to sleep with him then she would've just slept with him. The OP's reaction was very understandable, should he have just ignored the whole thing and pretended it wasn't there, I'm confused as to how you think he should've reacted.

    ReplyDelete
  42. @wolfie

    Or maybe she liked that this guy made her dinner and took her out while paying for everything.

    I realize that it wasn't outlined in that fashion, but we've seen enough greed from both sexes to realize that some people will take try to take advantage of everyone.

    Or maybe she just wanted to come over and shave again. By the time they got together again it probably would have been over a week since the last time.

    ReplyDelete
  43. Ok, let me just rephrase my last post, because I think it's stupid to argue with you on every individual point.

    "I'm totally with Mediator here. I think it's just as likely that she was sitting at the table, didn't like the way her legs felt in whatever clothes she was in, and wasn't that interested in cleaning up after herself so she shaved while in the bathroom and left a mess."

    I find this story much easier to believe than your account that the woman changed her mind about sex twice in one evening, and did not have her legs pre-shaven for this guy that she admittedly liked.

    ReplyDelete
  44. Pinkerton, Mediator - I see where you're coming from and I agree that you could theoretically build a case for her being a selfish grasping whore who just wants to clog up his tub again. But I think it would be a pretty flimsy case since it's based on only one piece of evidence - her clogging up the shower and lying to him about it. And those two pieces of evidence also support my own theory equally strongly.

    Building a case for Monica being a selfish and inconsiderate person requires you to demonstrate a PATTERN OF BEHAVIOR - not just one action. And don't say "Well, maybe she's just crazy." Even crazy people have patterns. Don't you think the OP would have included it in his story if Monica had demonstrated other odd or inconsiderate behavior? And think back to all the other stories you've read on here - when a person is crazy, usually you can pick up warning signs of that all throughout the story. THIS story, on the other hand, has no crazy or even inconsiderate behavior patterns from Monica - just this one isolated incident. Therefore I feel we need to look for other theories that fit this incident in ADDITION to matching her pattern of behavior on the date (which we can assume was fairly normal - OP said he had a great time, after all).

    ReplyDelete
  45. OK, she could have shaved herself for sexual reasons, she could have done it because she was extra-nuts and saw free shaving apparatus laying around - those are both *possible* motivations.

    I just think that it's way more likely that she wanted to get ready just in case her legs were to be seen later on that night, rather than just wanting a freebie.

    ReplyDelete
  46. @ Wolfdreams. my previous posts before my hairy girl post were just stupid shit just having a laugh, playing on the generalisation that as guys we are apparently able to mentally overcome or ignore away any warning signs of unstable people that might be an obstacle to sex, it was tongue in cheek typical guy humour.
    It would be ill advised to ignore the warning signs of unstable or inappropriate behavior, exploiting a situation or person by ignoring the obvious just for sex can potentially lead to a dangerous or hurtful situation.
    you sound like a decent nice person so sorry if i sounded critical my bad.
    To me it dosnt matter why, i would have just let it go and taken my chances and had another date or not contacted her again,take your pick, both can be justified but viewing said inapropriate behavior as a sexual prelude can be interpreted as a sign of loneliness or isolation, or a longterm lack of intimate and affectionate interaction, which happens to single guys a lot. longterm single guys can(not definately will) develop a chip on their shoulder towards women or their moral standards can drop or they can start to lose logical clarity and make behavioral associations that suit their needs regardless of the obvious stretch.
    Having a go at the op for making what any rational cautious person could accept as a sensible decision does make you come accross a little like someone not getting laid and a bit desperate.
    Getting laid is not the focus for people looking for a longterm relationship, its a persons general behavior, any clues that ring alarm bells no matter how softly is a cue to get out now!.Generally if you find the right person the sex is excellent.
    Isolation CAN(not defiately will) cause a shift in personal or group logic, said person or persons gradually become more and more tolerant of unusual or inappropriate behavior eg cults, teenage gangs, longtime single or friendless people, persons caught in abusive relationships.etc etc.or can start to manifest weird or unusual or inappropriate behavior.

    I will give your request a response even though i dont think you realy need it.It seems irrelevent to me.
    1. She became flustered and nervous and did something inappropriate.(didnt clean up after herself.
    2. She has obsessive compulsive disorder.
    3. She has a particular known disorder where people will leave physical evidence of their prior presence.It can be excrement, hair, blood, etc.Generally, isolation aggravates this condition.When accused of such a thing the act is always denied.Really i have no idea why and I cant be bothered thinking any further into it.

    Lastly id like to say that i am not making a judgement on anyones intelligence nor do i think that i am a clever person i am simply making a statement on peoples behavior, even very intelligent people act and think like dickheads sometimes.
    Emotions are not awlays based on facts, BUT YOU obviously think you know better than the op, so you think you are the clever one but you just sound imature and a little hung up and considering how many posts you made on this subject my advice would be let it go!
    Let it ALL go!!.

    ReplyDelete
  47. psychology has nothing to do with logic thats philosophy, psychology has to do with how the different parts of the brain interact.
    psychologists treat the symptoms and prescribe drugs.
    psychoanalysts explore a persons behavior to find the reasons for the symptoms.

    Monica was obviously really fat and didnt have a bathtub at home.the fact she didnt clean up after herself makes her a fat bitch without a bathtub.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Well, you're absolutely right about me not getting laid recently, but it's by choice and I'm perfectly comfortable with it. The last two women who wanted to sleep with me came with relationship strings pre-attached - and I'm pretty selective when it comes to relationships, since they carry a huge opportunity cost.

    I'm sorry I insulted your intelligence; I just was a little annoyed because I felt like you were trivializing the logical points that I and several other people brought up simply by dismissing us as desperate.

    Also, it's awesome that somebody still remembers the classic ABCotD "fat bitch" references. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  49. y'all need to calm down.

    ReplyDelete
  50. This idea that if she wanted sex she would have had it misses a key factor. He still has to pick up on it and escalate. Just because a woman is open to sex doesn't lean she will make the move. While some women are more aggressive, most women looking for sex will still wait on the guy to escalate. I've missed a mumber of lays in my life simply because I was oblivious to a girls signals.

    Iow, she didn't change her mind twice or not want to get laid. The OP just missed that he could take it further and dropped her home instead.

    And she was interested in him. Notice that she was the one who asked him out again, even in the midst of him shooting himself in the foot.

    ReplyDelete
  51. Okay, there seems to be a "guys-vs-gals" perspective battle going on here, so I'll be a female voice of reason in this.

    While I agree with the guys that MAYBE he shot himself in the foot for the chance to sleep with her because of his seemingly anal approach to questioning her, IF that was her agenda when she took the liberties to shave (he never specified what she shaved..one can only speculate it was her nether regions given he says "looked like a wooly mammoth...") in his bathroom, did it occur to anyone that maybe...just MAYBE...he wasn't interested in her in that aspect?

    There are no respective clues that he wanted that type of relationship with her. And I don't care what her reasons were, being that I buy razor cartriges (they're freakin expensive, and that's with my discount through my job), I'd have been P I S S E D if a guy used several of mine, especially without my permission. Maybe not so much IF i was interested in him for something longterm, but a guy that I'm just casually dating would have certainly set off those bells. I can't blame OP for his upset. That's no different than a guy pooing in my toilet, leaving it clogged, and then leaving it for me to discover on my own.

    Monica definitely displayed a poor sense of ethical & hygenic class in this instance..regardless of her reasons.

    TEAM OP

    ReplyDelete
  52. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  53. And @wolfie..I'm on a "no strings attached" kick right now...get at me :) Seeing as how Howie has deserted me :(

    ReplyDelete
  54. @R

    I'm a guy and I STILL don't think she was trying to have sex with him.

    ReplyDelete
  55. R, let me clarify - I never said I don't do relationships, just that I have higher standards for relationships than I do for sex. I'm actually pretty monogamous, but I prefer to go into relationships on a "temp-to-perm" basis - ie, it starts with no strings sex, and after a little while I come to a decision on whether I want to change that to a monogamous relationship or keep it permanently as just a hookup. So when my female friends hit on me strongly - but preface their moves with phrases like "I'm a relationship type of girl" or "I could never sleep with anyone unless there's feelings involved" then I just call bullshit, since they expect me to promise them a relationship before they've demonstrated their value. It's just poor sales technique, and a really big turnoff.

    As for your kind offer, I would gladly take you up on it, if I were human - but remember I'm not: I'm just a really smart dog using the computer while his owner is out of the house. My owner is already getting suspicious that copies of "Wild Bitches Weekly" and "Sexy Vixxxens" keep arriving at the house; it'd be really hard to conceal that I'm humping a human female's leg on the regular.

    ReplyDelete
  56. Maybe it was a furry Ninja!!

    ReplyDelete
  57. Personally I don't care the reasons for all this, my problem with all this is she made a huge mess in the bathroom and didn't clean it up! some people like having clean bathrooms, OP is NOT her cleaning slave just for a little intimacy. If you make a mess you clean it up.

    ReplyDelete
  58. I don't think anyone approves of her making a mess. Its just that the OP seemed to miss why she was shaving her legs and kept trying to get a her to confess something she was clearly embarrassed about.

    ReplyDelete
  59. DUH using MEN's shave and it is also unhygenic to use someone ele's razor/toothbrush and even contacts! I stopped using razors long time ago cuz they make hairs grow even thicker and fast too..
    Wax and sweet all the way

    ReplyDelete
  60. maybe she shaved something other than her legs?

    ReplyDelete

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.