12/14/2011

It's Fun to Try to Pronounce This

Email Sent in by Marlene:

So I was sitting alone in my room (what else is new?) when I was browsing online personals (see last parentheticals) when I stumbled, head over heels into your profile.

It was as if I was walking along, minding my own business when all of a sudden I fell down some steps!  La la da da dee da… OMFG, SHIT!!!! AAAGAAGAGHHh BAAFFFF(UMMMBBAARFABBARFFBNFFMFM)FN…!!!

I thought it was the end of me! But it wasn't! I am clearly alive for a purpose! Do you believe in fate/destiny? Now I do! And it's all because of you!

I guess the next step is up to you! You will look at my profile! You will read it! You will write me back! I can't wait!

Joey

8 comments:

  1. You will be freaked out! You will want to change your email address! You will want to swear off dating and get a dog!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Aw, I thought this one was kind of funny, if a bit overzealous.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I thought he was going to start insulting her- after all, falling down stairs hurts. I'm glad this was a positive email. (positive-ish)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Fuck! He's falling down all those stairs!

    We warned you about stairs, bro! We told you, dog!

    IT KEEPS HAPPENING.

    We told you, man. We TOLD you about stairs!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I thought it was the end of me! But it wasn't! I am clearly alive for a purpose!

    If THIS email is the best he can do, then I guess his "purpose" must be to masturbate furiously into a sock each night for the rest of his life and then cry about how lonely he is. Truly, fate/destiny moves in mysterious ways...

    ReplyDelete
  6. @rawr: DaMmIt, yOu bEaT Me tO It. HoNk. :o(

    ReplyDelete
  7. Poor lil' guy. He tried, but came out just on the wrong side of no I don't think so sparky. D+ sport, we grade on a curve here.

    Notes: don't put barf repeatedly in the middle of your falling yell, that's probably not the imagery you were going for right there, even if the barf is fab.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am going to copy and paste that email, and see if I get better results.

    ReplyDelete

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