11/13/2011

Waking Up in a Stranger's House

Story Sent in by Alan:

Camille and I had been on one date already. She offered to pick me up at my house for our second date. We had planned to go out to a dinner theatre production.

A full half hour before I was expecting her, the sound of a loud car horn blared from my front yard, and flashing white lights blinked over and over into the house. I looked out the window to see a car I didn't recognize parked on my front lawn, facing the house, its brights flicking on and off like a strobe.

I ran out of the house to find Camille sitting in the car, honking the horn and flashing the brights. She waved at me from inside the car. I knocked on her window and yelled, "Stop! Stop!"

She smacked her window twice with her palm, then gave me a big grin and rolled it down. The unmistakable smell of alcohol blasted out at me.

"Hi, Alan! Ready to go?" she asked, then laughed.

I said, "I have a better idea. Come in my house for a sec."

She came willingly, but she needed substantial support just to make it up my three front steps. How she had actually driven over in that condition without killing anyone will forever be a mystery to me. I parked her on my couch, put a blanket around her, turned off the lights, and she was out in less than five minutes.

The next morning, I kept checking on her. My room was on the second floor, and she left sometime in the early afternoon, though I'm not positive when. At some point, I looked out the window, and her car was gone. I checked downstairs, and she was no longer there. She must have woken up, wondered where the hell she was, and took off. I probably would've done the same thing. Never heard from her again.

12 comments:

  1. You left out the part where you hit that!

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  2. Steve, you left out the part where that's called sexual assault!

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  3. It's not sexual assault if she doesn't remember!

    Oh no, wait - I think that's still sexual assault.

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  4. Is it still sexual assault if he carried her back to the house like a bowling ball or 6 pack?

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  5. ^Nope, that's just convenience...

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  6. Steve, go read Schrodinger's Rapist.

    Also, you're an idiot.

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  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. @Gnome after our last talk I can't believe that you of all people would defend Steve.

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  10. Speaking of rape, I've always had this question. If a woman is sober or relatively sober and she gets a guy drunk and they do the deed, is she raping him?

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