11/16/2011

Must Run in the Family

Emails Sent in by Chris:

Dear Chris:

Thanks for your e-mail. I checked out your profile and you seem more illiterate than my stupid 6-year-old nephew. Don't get me wrong, I love him and everything. He's just stupider than birch bark.

Thanks anyway!

Marci


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Chris Responds:

Marci,

Every word was spelled right on my profile and my sentences were grammatically correct. What the hell are you talking about?

Chris


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Marci Responds:

Chris, I am SO SORRY: I read your e-mail, clicked on another person's profile link, thought it was yours, and responded in kind. My bad.

Unfortunately, that other profile will forever be associated with you. I can't now think of you as anything other than an illiterate buffoon who doesn't know his ass from the sun around which we all rotate. I'm sorry but morons have their price and this time one of them took you out. Maybe next time!

Marci


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Chris Responds:

Marci,

We revolve around the sun. We don't rotate around it.

Chris


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Marci Responds:

F**k you, Chris. You illiterate, sanctimonius astronomy-wearing bastard suck monkey d**kass!


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Chris Responds:

Marci,

You spelled "sanctimonious" wrong.

Chris

33 comments:

  1. Ooooh I like this OP!

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  2. I've always wondered how many women have profiles for the sole purpose of rejecting anyone that emails them. It's like it fulfills some twisted need for validation or something...

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  3. Well, technically we both revolve AND rotate around the sun. We revolve in an orbit, but we're rotating the whole time as well.

    Still, worth it to get that reaction though.

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    Replies
    1. But we don't rotate around the sun per se. The earth rotates on its own axis but revolves around the sun.

      Delete
  4. Steve, I once put a personal ad on Craigslist simply for the validation that I got from the responses. That is why the Internet exists. I understand it's frustrating for people actually looking for something real, but you should get over it.

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    Replies
    1. I have no problem with this, but did you insult the people who responded?

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  5. ^ Somewhere, Al Gore is rolling in his grave...

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  6. Astronomy-wearing?

    Ahahaha. This was fantastic, OP.

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  7. @Amanda - are you serious? Why do you feel you need validation from complete strangers? That seems rather... weak.

    I mean, I could see how the approval of friends and peers is important, and I can vaguely grok the "strangers exist for my amusement" mentality, but why do you actually care what they THINK of you? With all due respect, that seems like a defect.

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  8. (And by the way, I agree - this post was awesome) :-)

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  9. @wolfdreams: Although I'd never do something like posting a Craigslist ad for validation, because it seems like a self-centered attention-whore act, validation from strangers means more to me than validation from friends and family. I guess it's about mattering to The World rather than your own circle, most of whom are predisposed to be favorable toward you. I can't understand -not- caring what strangers think. People you don't know are still people (and people with the "strangers exist for my amusement" mentality are terrifying sociopaths for not thinking so); there are a whole lot more of them than people you do know, and they are what society is made up of.

    Also, I've never seen "grok" before, but I think I like it.

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  10. I completely agree that validation from the sweaty, greasy, rotund child molesters that dwell on craigslist is important to me as well, to validate myself as a sexually appealing, intelligent and strong woman.

    I'm just kidding, Amanda must be trolling. I hope.

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  11. Ankh, "grok" is a term that comes from Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land, if you want to check it out for more background (and totally trippy sixties free love scifi weirdness).

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  12. Wow Amanda, that is not something you should just throw out there to the masses - it really doesn't make you sound like anything but someone who is shallow, needy, and lacking in self-esteem.

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  13. I understand that it paints me in a bad light. But you try not being kissed until you were in college and then not even being TOUCHED for years and years. You would yearn for some sort of male attention, no matter how greasy. However, I now get regular sex from my totally hot husband and only get on Craigslist for cheap furniture.

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  14. That response made it seem like I trolled Craigslist for sex. I posted one ad where I was looking for a make-out partner, got 112 responses, and didn't respond to a single one. I think it triggered the same sort of smug-complex part of my brain that is also satisfied by reading this site and advice columns. The "I'm not the most hopeless one out there" cortex.

    This thread suggests otherwise, thought. This thread suggests that I am indeed the most hopeless one out there. Possibly also a sociopath.

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  15. Its actually pretty common for people to have profiles up when they really arn't that interested in dating. Can't say it hurts to get messages from different people who think you are attractive (or fuckable).

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  16. Wow, Amanda is either trolling or a truly pitiful excuse for a human being. Or both. Both is an option too.

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  17. @Ankh Ascendent - Actually at least one of my best friends has that mentality, and I trust him WAY more than any of my "normal" friends. More so in fact since he doesn't easily form emotional bonds, so he cherishes the few that he does have more deeply. With other friends, I sometimes find myself assessing their loyalty, but with him I know it's uttely unwavering.

    I think a lot of people confuse sociopathy with psychopathy, which explains the stigma. Psychopaths are people who are utterly incapable of forming loving emotional bonds, whereas sociopaths can form emotional bonds but are uncaring of the world outside of those ties. (For example, James Bond would probably qualify as a sociopath.)

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  18. P.S. "Grok" comes from the Heinlein book Stranger in a Strange Land - it's definitely an appropriate term from time to time. :-)

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  19. @ Amanda: I'm a 21-year-old virgin who has also never been kissed and even I am not that pathetically desperate for attention. "You would yearn for some sort of male attention, no matter how greasy." Um... no. Frankly, I find this statement offensive. It implies that all women are sad attention-seekers with no standards. I do not NEED male attention to feel good about myself and I have no respect for anybody who does. I especially have no respect for people who are so callous that they completely disregard the feelings of others in their trek for acknowledgment. Aren't you awesome, leading men on just so you can pat yourself on the back? Good job!

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  20. @ wolfdreams: Actually, a sociopath is exactly the same as a psychopath. The only difference is that psychopaths are born the way they are while sociopaths become they way they are through negative life experiences. They are no more capable of love than psychopaths are.

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  21. Nope, that's wrong. Sociopath and psychopath used to be distinct clinical terms but nowadays the difference has grown more fuzzy to the general public because most people (especially Hollywood writers) don't bother reading the clinical definitions and instead use them interchangeably. Here's a good reference.

    http://blogs.psychcentral.com/forensic-focus/2010/07/sociopathy-vs-psychopathy/

    You're absolutely correct about the fact that psychopathy is nature whereas sociopathy is nurture, but pretty much every qualified clinical source agrees that there are major distinctions in their behavior as well.

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  22. ^ Sorry, but I still disagree with that definition. My own father was a diagnosed sociopath and I can most certainly attest that he never felt any attachment for me or the rest of our family. He certainly never felt any remorse for any of his actions. So, no.

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  23. ^ Well, here's the second result of the Google search "Sociopathy vs Psychopathy" (the other one I gave you was the first). It says pretty much exactly the same thing - sociopaths can feel empathy for specific groups, but not society as a whole.

    http://helpingpsychology.com/sociopath-vs-psychopath-whats-the-difference

    Obviously I don't know your family situation (although let me express my condolences - it sounds like a very rough upbringing) but based solely on what you've described I think your dad simply got misdiagnosed and was probably a psychopath with a lower tendency to violence. Also, I hope this doesn't sound too tactless but as somebody who was on the receiving end of his abuse you might not be the best qualified to make a diagnosis because because you'd have a strong emotional bias.

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  24. Hang on, I read all the comments and I am getting really bummed out... To track back quite a few steps, GO OP!

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  25. Aw, Baku... I know you're not looking for sympathy, but I'd totally give you a hug right now if I could.

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  26. Oh my goodness Baku, we're talking about people on CRAIGSLIST! I'll be damned if I'm going to worry about cranking their chains for my own jollies.

    GO OP!!

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    Replies
    1. I know I'm a year late, but I agree with you , Amanda. These are craigslist people. It's a different ballgame entirely. And all they are doing is answering an ad via e-mail. It's not like you made dates with all these men and then didn't show up. Men get rejected by women all the time and women get rejected by men. I don't think it's that big of a deal that you used to do this. I'm sure that the craigslist men got over it. All I was trying to say was that what you used to do is different from the girl in the story because she insulted the guy because her ego was bruised and that's lame. At any rate, the OP is beyond awesome and seems like a cool dude.

      Delete
    2. I know I'm a year late, but I agree with you , Amanda. These are craigslist people. It's a different ballgame entirely. And all they are doing is answering an ad via e-mail. It's not like you made dates with all these men and then didn't show up. Men get rejected by women all the time and women get rejected by men. I don't think it's that big of a deal that you used to do this. I'm sure that the craigslist men got over it. All I was trying to say was that what you used to do is different from the girl in the story because she insulted the guy because her ego was bruised and that's lame. At any rate, the OP is beyond awesome and seems like a cool dude.

      Delete
  27. Go OP!! & Amanda, aww Baku,*hug*..

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  28. The thread comments here turned very, very strange.

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  29. Wth happened to this thread?
    (I love the comments on this blog)

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