10/25/2011

"Wet but Satisfied"

Story Sent in by Cathy:

Paul and I sat in a coffee shop on our first date together. We were talking, and everything was going well. Then, as he reached for his hot coffee, he spilled it across the table and into my lap.

I cried out, stood, and mopped it up from my lap with a clump of napkins.

Paul stared, frozen. Then, he laughed hysterically and pointed. "Ahahahahahaha! You've got coffee crotch! Ha ha ha!"

"This isn't funny!" I yelled.

"Ha ha ha!" he laughed so much that he was shaking. "Oh my God, that's terrific! Stupid bitch! Ahahahaha… ah…"

I had an iced coffee, and it was within easy grabbing and splattering distance. I was so tempted. So very tempted. He was laughing so hard, he wouldn't see it coming. It would make me feel better. It would also sink me down to his level. His grinning, putrid, asshole level. Come on, Cathy, turn the other cheek, turn the other cheek, just walk away, just walk…

I grabbed my drink and splashed it all over his stomach and lap. His laughter stopped. He jumped up and yelled, "You stupid bitch! What was that for?"

He ran for the bathroom. Someone behind the coffee shop counter, who I guessed to be a manager, shouted, "Hey! What's going on here?"

Without even looking back, I walked out of there. Wet, but satisfied.

6 comments:

  1. She was justified. You do not use "Bitch" towards a woman EVER, not even as a joke, unless she is in on it.

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  2. Team OP here. The guy had it coming.

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  3. Totally on Op's side here, it was worth it.

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  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  5. He deserved it.

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    Replies
    1. But she still shouldn't have done it. Two wrongs don't make a right. She should have just left.

      Delete

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