9/28/2011

Roadside Unattraction

Story Sent in by Jason:

The strangeness actually occurred after my date with Elena was technically over. I lived close enough to the cafe to walk from home, but she lived a few miles away and had driven in. We had parted after a good first meeting, and I was planning to contact her again.

It was dark out on my way home, and I was on the sidewalk when a car pulled up alongside me, flashed its brights and beeped. I thought that it might have been someone who needed directions, so I approached it and its passenger window rolled down.

It was Elena. I hadn't seen her car before and so didn't know it to recognize it. I was happy to see her again, and figured that she may have been lost. I asked, "Everything okay?"

She said, "Yeah. What are you doing out here?"

I replied, "I'm walking home. I said I was going to do that, remember?"

She said, "I guess. Why aren't you wearing reflectors?"

I smiled. "I'm just walking on the sidewalk."

"You should be in reflective clothing."

I looked down at what I was wearing and said, "I didn't have time to change after our date. I'll be fine, but thanks for your concern."

She banged on her steering wheel and said, "You won't be fine! Not if I have anything to say about it!" She then zoomed off, down the road, almost running over my feet in the process.

As I watched, she turned around in a far-off driveway, then floored it past me in the other direction. She honked as she flew by.

I wrote her an email that night to let her know that I had a good time on our date, but that I didn't understand what the deal was with her post-date antics.

She wrote back: "wear reflectors. xo."

I didn't write back to her, and she never contacted me again.

4 comments:

  1. "You won't be fine! Not if I have anything to say about it!"

    Well there's a threat if I've ever heard one.

    ReplyDelete
  2. No kidding, Mediator. And a car is considered a deadly weapon. Given that she showed no remorse, it's a safe bet that she'll be doing the same to other pedestrians until somebody hauls her away.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sadly, this story has a twist.
    Bad news, Elena lost a guy she was dating to a hit and run driver. Unfortunately for him, he wasn't wearing any relfective gear and died a slow, painful death.
    The good news is he who a long distance runner who ran away from his wife and screaming 3 children...

    ReplyDelete
  4. I definitely thought that after her threat, this story was going to take a turn towards "perpendicular vee-hicular ho-micide," as Ludacris once said. I'm both happy and kinda disappointed that she didn't try to run OP over.

    ReplyDelete

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