9/30/2011

Or She Had X-RAY VISION

Story Sent in by Wendell:

Marcy and I had been on one date already, and I thought it would be a nice gesture for me to invite her over to my apartment for dinner. She said that she'd bring lasagna.

She rang the intercom when she arrived downstairs. I buzzed her in and told her to let herself into my place, as I was working over the stove.

I heard her enter and I called, "I'm in the kitchen!"

When she entered, her eyes widened at me, she screamed, and dropped her tray of lasagna on the floor.

I jumped away from the stove, thinking that there was a fire or spider or something similarly catastrophic. I asked, "What is it? What–?"

"You're–you're naked!" she yelled, and ran away from me and out of the apartment.

For the record, I was not naked. Not in the slightest. I was in jeans and a shirt. The very opposite of naked, in fact. Instinctively, I jogged after her, down the hall. I even yelled, "I'm not naked!" a few times until I realized how strange that would likely sound to anyone else on the floor who heard.

I stopped and let her go. I then ran back to my apartment and called her. I was actually expecting her to not pick up, but she did, out of breath. She said, "Hello?"

I replied, "Hi, Marcy. You coming back? I'm not naked."

She said, "I can't talk to you now. I'm busy running away from you," and then hung up.

I was able to salvage most of her lasagna and enjoyed it very much over the next few nights. She was either completely insane or she went through an awful lot of trouble to essentially tell me that she didn't want to see me anymore.

11 comments:

  1. This story seems extremely odd, i am almost positive something essential is missing here. There is just something about his writing that seems....made up..

    Let's pray for a rebuttal

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  2. Or a dare. That's my hunch. I really liked this one, regardless. Possibly because I know a couple of people who I can see pulling this off.

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  3. The phone call is my favorite part. This is a winner of a story.

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  4. She heard the advice that if you're nervous, just picture people in their underwear, or naked. She over did it.

    Or, she has been seeing a hypnotist about her anxiety attacks. Following the same advice, he put her under and suggested "Whenever you feel nervous, the person causing you to feel nervous will look naked to you."

    This happens all the time.

    All the time.

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  5. Yeah, I love the phone call too. The fact that she answered the phone just to tell him she's too busy running away to talk to him. Now I'm waiting for the story of the woman that sends the text "Sorry I can't text you right now, I'm too busy fumbling through my pockets to find my keys so I can't type you any messages."

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  6. I dunno if it's just me, but if I have made food, I would not part with it that easily just to fuck with people.

    So I'd say that she's either insane or the OP is lying in one way or another.

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  7. Could have been a store-bought lasagna with absolutely no natural ingredients.

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  8. I sure wouldn't eat no crazy lady lasagna. Hell no. Keep your psycho pasta away from my tummy.

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  9. This site's comment section is crying out for a 'Like' button!

    ReplyDelete

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