8/02/2011

Wine, Women, and Wack

Story Sent in by Sharon:

James and I worked together, and then when I switched jobs, we stayed friends, although we didn't see each other for several months. Finally, he called me up to ask if I wanted to hang out, and I invited him over to my place.

As we were sitting and laughing over wine, he confessed that he liked me.

"I'm flattered," I said, "Maybe we can take it slow–"

His lips were on mine. I pressed mine tightly together, as I wasn't prepared to jump into something like that with him.

He broke away and said, "It works better if you open your mouth."

I was about to say, "Let's take it slow," when his lips pressed against mine again. I pushed at him and he broke away once more.

He said, "It's more romantic and sexy when you open your mouth. Try it."

He went for it again, but I stood up and stepped away. "James," I said, "This is a little unexpected, and I think we should take things slow."

"I agree," he said, "Let's make out."

I laughed and replied, "By 'take things slow,' I mean that we should spend a bit more time together. I haven't seen you in months."

"So we have some catching up to do," he said, "Come here."

He didn't make a move toward me, but it was clear what he wanted me to do. I repeated, "Let's take things slow, okay? I'm really very flattered that you brought it up, though."

"So you like me, too?"

"We'll see–"

"Want to try kissing again?"

"I–no thanks. Why don't we go out to dinner, or–"

He groaned and said, "There's no time! We've already wasted enough. Kiss me or," he stood up and strode to my counter, where my bottle of Syrah was sitting, then picked it up. I was afraid that he'd drop it on the floor. "Kiss me or I'll drink this whole thing."

"James, don't be–"

"You going to kiss me or not?"

"No, James."

He held the bottle to his lips and downed the rest of it, slammed the bottle onto my counter, belched at me, wiped his mouth, and made for my apartment door.

"James!" I called after him, as he had driven to my place and didn't think he was in any state to be standing, let alone driving.

I ran down the hall, after him. When I caught up to him, he stopped and asked, "Are you ready to kiss me now, for real?"

"No. Why don't you take it easy for a sec and–"

He shoved me away. "Then get away from me!" he yelled, and half-run, half-fell down the stairs.

I didn't have a choice. I ran back to my apartment and called the police to briefly explain the situation and let them know that James was about to put himself (and possibly others) in some serious danger.

They thanked me for my call, and I have no idea what happened after that, if they caught him in time or not. I never heard from James again.

4 comments:

  1. He might have got the message better if OP had not 'pressed her lips together', but just pushed him off and said 'I don't want to kiss you'.

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  2. Yeah, sure — but if you give a firm "no" up front, you don't leave yourself any wiggle room for changing your mind later. You know, in case everyone else on Earth dies and that one other person becomes your last resort.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Maybe she should have been more forceful with her denial, but at least she called the police instead of just locking the door behind the guy and letting him go.

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  4. Being straight-forward about your feelings FAIL...well, for OP. James was pretty damn clear.

    ReplyDelete

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