8/15/2011

There Are Pesticides in the Grass

Profile Sent in by Clifton:

About me:

I have a deep love for great cheddar cheese, motorbikes, and ravens. I also eat grass whenever I can. It's all around us. Why not?

I've been to five colleges. None have been good enough for me. I want to start my own in which I teach nobility and razor sharp wit!

I think I may be the (re)incarnation of a famous writer! I know languages well. No substance abuse here, nor do I tolerate any!

I may or may not account for every minute you spend/don't spend with me. Nothing personal. Just my personality! I've learned to protect myself! If you're not with me and you don't account for it, I assume you're with another woman. Nothing personal! Just how I run things! Don't be an asshole and we'll get along fine! Don't like it! Eat it!

4 comments:

  1. or that overuse of exclamation points are obnoxious.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I *also* love a great sharp cheddar, and the Ravens are my favorite football team. However, I don't assume that if you aren't in my line of sight, you're fucking other women (or men). Just my personality!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Holy shit, keep this one away with fire! Having to submit written and photographic evidence of where you were at all times is pure, distilled, insanity.

    Have to set up cameras when you're sleeping to prove that, and god help you if you leave the room in the middle of the night to use the restroom.

    ReplyDelete
  4. As some creatures in nature adorn bright colors to inform the world that they are probably toxic and shouldn't be eaten, some people on dating sites have this kind of crap in their profiles to inform the world that they shouldn't be dated.

    ReplyDelete

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