8/12/2011

Cradle of Fear

Email Sent in by Marti:

I am different from other men. I will not force you into sex. I grew up with four sisters. I know how to respect women. I have been with many and they all say the same thing. That same thing is that I am different from other men.

I am different from other men in other ways. I will cradle your head, leg, arm, toe, or whatever needs cradling. I will then return it to you. You retain full ownership and can cancel our contract at any time. I am also different from other men in the way I use telephones. They are all filled with wiring that we hold up to our faces. I can stop this for you if you let me.

This must stop.

Sheldon

18 comments:

  1. what if her phone needs cradling? Will he help?

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  2. I'm not sure how I feel about this...other than creeped out, of course.

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  3. I'm glad he announced that he wasn't ever going to rape her. 'Cause we all know rapists (all other men according to this guy) totally announce their intentions to rape beforehand. They also never have sisters.

    I'm confused as to what he's stopping. The use of telephones...?

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  4. Seriously creeped out right now.

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  5. I'd say he was overly, terribly successful in setting himself apart from other men. In the worst way possible.

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  6. If he is so different, why is he single?

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  7. I love this one. Love it. So straight forward.

    And bizarre.

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  8. I think the "four sisters" were all parts of his own Multiple Personality Syndrome.

    Sybil, anyone?

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  9. this sounds fake... And suspciously like Sheldon from Big Bang Theory.

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  10. ^I changed the name. If it sounds like a particular TV character, then it's a coincidence. I don't watch Big Bang Theory, but I'd be astounded if there exists a character on any show who is similar to this person and has lasted over a single episode.

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  11. Big Bang's Sheldon doesn't want to cradle any part of you, because you have germs.

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  12. ^^ I've never seen Big Bang, but he was on a list of "Most Sociopathic Characters", or something along those lines, so it might be a match. What's more he seems to be a favorite character. Scary...

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  13. Sheldon, sociopathic? He's a jackass, certainly, but that's about it.

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  14. Even if it is "cradled" in a miterbox and hacked off, what a relief to know my limb will be returned!

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  15. @Baku

    The term sociopath doesn't really mean exactly what society has made it out to in this day and age. I love Big Bang Theory, and without Sheldon, that show would have nothing going for it. But this isn't a guy like Dexter we're talking about.

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  16. ^ I do know what a sociopath is, having been related to one and done research to understand him. I don't know if Sheldon is a sociopath, seeing as I have never seen the show. I'm just saying that he was on a list of such characters. *shrug*

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  17. I don't think Sheldon is a sociopath, possibly more along the autism spectrum? His lack of understanding facial expressions, societal norms, and his distaste for physical intimacy...and he DOES care for other people - his friends anyway - he just doesn't sshow it well.

    Also, Baku, give the show a try! It's funny even for people like me with a wide knowledge of comic books but a limited knowledge of science. ;)

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  18. Hmm, based on this Wikipedia article, he may very well be a Psycopath.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychopathy

    Lack of empathy, shallow emotions, intelligence, and perceptual/emotional recognition deficits. He's 4/5 on characteristics.

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