7/01/2011

Tpwned

Story Sent in by Abe:

Janet and I went out to dinner for our first date, at a small place known for its wine selection.  I'm not too into wines, but she was, and so I thought it would be a nice way to pass the time while learning more about each other.

She liked the place, and we had a nice time over dinner and drinks.  It wasn't until after dinner that the fire, as opposed to the sparks, flew.

I walked her back to her car, on a nearby residential street that was packed with other parked vehicles.  When we made it there, she glanced up and down the block and said, "Where's my car?"

Her car was gone.  She walked back and forth, walking up a ways, then back down.  "I can't believe this," she said, "I'm going to call the cops."

I asked her, "Do you remember exactly where you parked it?"

"Right around here," she said, pointing to the curb near where we stood.

She had an older Ford Taurus, and the neighborhood seemed quiet enough, so it puzzled me that out of all the slightly more upscale vehicles, someone would have chosen hers to drive off.

"Maybe it was towed?" I suggested.

"I was parked legally," she said, "No way was it towed."

As if in answer, a few moments later, a nearby house's porch light turned on, and its front door opened.  An older man walked out of the house and took a few steps toward us.

"Hey, was that your car?  The Taurus?" he asked.

Janet approached him.  "Yes!  Did you see who took it?"

He raised his voice a bit and replied, "The tow company I called.  You blocked my driveway."

In response, she screamed, high and loud.  The lights of some neighboring houses turned on.  The man went on, "That's not necessary.  I'm sure it was an honest mistake, but I had to park.  Do you need to use my phone?  You can call them up and work it out."

I thought that was particularly generous of him, but if I was in Janet's shoes, I likely would have been just as upset as she was.  Well, maybe.

"You piece of shit!" she boomed at him, "I have work at seven in the morning!  The tow place is probably closed by now!"

The man backed toward his house and said, "Never mind, then.  Go fuck yourself."

I felt the need to step in and said, "Maybe we should all calm down and figure this out."

Janet spun to me and said, "You shut the fuck up!  I was parked a mile away from this asshole's driveway, and he called them to tow it away for no reason!"

The man took that opportunity to return inside and shut off his porch light.  Janet turned back to his house and yelled, "You piece of shit!  I'm going to fuck up something of yours!"

From somewhere in the neighborhood, I heard a woman's voice say, "I'm calling the police."  Great.

I said to Janet, "Let me go and talk to the guy, to at least get the tow company's name."

"Oh, I'll get my car back.  You watch," she said, and stormed off, down the street, and away from me.  At that point, I wondered how far my first-date responsibility went.  I believe in good faith that I was offering up the most responsible course of action, and she was ignoring it.  Also, the cops were very likely on their way over, and I would have rather not been caught in the middle of these things.

I decided to give her one last shot (she was upset and tired.  I didn't want to leave her stomping around the streets) and so I knocked on the guy's door until he answered.  By the way he swung the door open, he was clearly in no mood to talk, but I remained calm and asked him for the tow company's information, which he gave me.

Armed with that, I called up Janet (as I had no idea where she had gone).  Her phone rang to voicemail, and I left her the information. Then, without anything else constructive to do, I left.  Didn't hear from her again after that, but I hope that everything worked out.

7 comments:

  1. I guess taking a bus to work would be a problem?

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  2. Moderation is not her game.

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  3. See this? This is what guys should do when their dates turn out to be inconsiderate people, unlike coffee cake man.

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  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  5. ^ Um... no. The situations in this story and the coffee cake one are completely different.

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  6. I'm going to say that this guy went over and beyond his duties. Applause, well done.

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  7. Eh. When people start swearing for no reason, I just leave them alone. Obviously they aren't going to listen to reason.

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