6/19/2011

Record Discord

Story Sent in by Chris:

I found Moira online, and after I sent her a first message, she wrote back with an excited response. She was a nanny and a ceramic artist who had met with some success in selling her work. We set up a date at a local place.

After we sat down, she pulled out a small black device. "Do you mind if I record this?" she asked.

"Why?" I asked.

She said, "Because I want to."

"Why really?"

"I just want to remember it. I have a good feeling about us."

I said, "I'd prefer if you didn't. Knowing that I'm being recorded will probably change what I would have otherwise said."

"I don't get it," she said, "What would be different? You planning to say some offensive things?"

"No. I just don't see why we can't have a good time without being recorded."

"Fine," she said, sliding the device off the table, "It would have been a nice thing, but never mind. Now you can be as inappropriate and offensive as you want!" She threw the recorder into her purse, folded her hands on the table, and said, "Go on. Offend me!"

I laughed and said, "I don't want to offend you. Can't we just have a normal conversation?"

"Of course!" she said, brightening, and then she pulled out the recorder again.

I couldn't help but grin at this, and I said, "Without the recorder."

A flash of rage blazed across her face, and she hoisted the recorder into the air and smashed it onto the floor, where it broke into pieces. People at nearby tables turned their heads, and the smile disappeared from my face.

She scooped up the pieces quickly, and with a queer smirk, shoveled them into her purse. Not surprisingly, that killed the conversation. We ordered dinner after that, we had some awkward small talk, split the check, and went our separate ways. Thank goodness.

10 comments:

  1. Ah OP - you spoiled the first date of a marvelous romance, one that was destined to end in marriage and some wonderful children. She would have hand-spun all your crockery, that would last until your dying days until - hand in hand and on your common death bed - you both listened to that recording of your first date. The date that launched a love that would have echoed through time.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I don't understand people who, after finding out how maladjusted or awful their dates are, actually STAY and order dinner forcing themselves to endure the company of these insane people.

    ReplyDelete
  3. About halfway through this story, Lonely Island's "Threw It On The Ground" started playing in my head and made it infinitely better.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Why would you stay? If you didn't order anything before that point it's not that hard to walk out.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I agree with PPs why OP would you stay and have dinner with this obvious nutcase?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yep, I feel the same as the above comments. If you had no investment in the evening, and she obviously wasn't going to work out... why stay?

    ReplyDelete
  7. In defense for OP (and this ain't an easy task) maybe he was really hungry and really bored. Just wanted to see what she'd do next. Unfortunately, further dinner theatre she did not provide.

    ReplyDelete
  8. @Matthew Polite conversation and date TO THE GROUND!!!!

    The moral of the story is you can't trust the system.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I think OP/Chris was scared to leave after she smashed it onto the floor.

    Or in the spirit of The Lonely Island he takes it, plays it back, hears her voice and says "Hey this is you" handing it back to her to which she responds "Man, this ain't me, this is a recorder" then she threw it on the ground, cause she's not a recorder, duh.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm with Connie, maybe he was hoping she would flip a table over or something.

    ReplyDelete

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.