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12/12/2010

I'll Bet that He Didn't Bring a Bikini, Either

Story Submitted by Kerry:

Drew and I had been talking online for a few weeks when he asked if I wanted to hit up a beach for our first date.  It was mid-September and although the weather was cooling off a bit, I thought it would be a nice way to spend an afternoon.

As I said, it was a first date, so I asked him if we could drive separate.  I was already halfway there when he sent me a text.  It read, "Bring a bikini!"

I laughed it off.  First off, it was too cold out for anything like that and second, it was our first time meeting each other.  Just no.

When I met up with him there, he gave me a big hug and we walked up and down the beach.  A few families were there with kids, but it was otherwise unpopulated.

He turned to me and asked, "Your bikini back in the car?"

I laughed and said, "I didn't bring it.  It's too cold."

He gave me a weird stare, then said, "You can use my bathing suit then.  I can go in in my boxers."

I laughed again and said, "I don't think I'll be taking anything off or putting anything on or jumping in anywhere.  It's too cold."

"Did you bring a bikini?" he asked me again.

"No," I said, "I already told you that."

"Why the fuck not?" he asked.

I stopped liking him at that moment and said, "For the reasons that I just said.  It's too cold, and it's a first date."

"You seriously didn't bring your bikini?" he asked again.

I shook my head.  He mumbled something that sounded like, "You took it all off for those other guys."

I had no idea what he was talking about, and I asked him to repeat what he had said.  He said, "Nothing, I didn't say anything!" and stormed back up the beach, toward the parking lot.

I remained down by the water, watching the waves.  I glanced up several times to watch him go, and when I finally made my way back to the lot, he was nowhere to be seen.

3 comments:

"Where is your fucking bikini?!"
"I left it at home, right next to my regular one."

Ohhh Joel, that's a knee slapper!

Great date.

Wow, these guys make me hate being a man...

Then I remember I don't have to deal with pregnancy, periods, or subtly hating someone for years because of something that happened in grade school...

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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