Submitted by Daisy:
Drew and I met online. We decided to go to a café in a quaint little downtown area. It was the dead of winter, just after an ice storm. We were walking down a sidewalk, on our way, when he slipped and fell on a patch of ice!
My first reaction was, "Are you all right?" and I bent to help him up. He was none the worse for wear, but he shot me a dirty look, as if I was responsible for him falling. "Are you all right?" I asked him again, and again he didn't answer.
I smiled, trying to diffuse what was becoming a tense situation, and he said, "Don't you laugh at me!" He forged onward, and I followed, confused and a little weirded out.
Just outside the café, we were about to enter when I slipped and nearly fell, but Drew pointed and yelled, "HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
I said, "Uh..."
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"I–"
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"Drew, what–"
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
I didn't say anything else. He cleared his throat and said, "Doesn't feel so good, does it?"
"Uh..."
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
I said nothing else. He opened the door to the café and went inside. I turned and booked it back to my car. Luckily, I didn't slip or fall. I didn't need to have breakfast with an asshole that day. Or any day, for that matter.
22 comments:
First!
Really? You wanna be That Guy on this forum? Be a *little* more creative, okay, 9:57?
Oh wow, lame 9:57.
Good grief Ice Guy! Buddy can't handle falling on some ice? Buddy's gotta laugh a little. Good for you for getting out of there and not sitting through a pointless date. Nice.
Fourth!
I plead the FIFTH!!
I wanna have SIXTH with Daisy...she thounds HOT
I'm thirsty, I think I'll have a SEVEN up...
Is Daisy hot? My magic EIGHT balls reads: "All signs point to yes".
Nine Inch Nails used to be a good band and all, but then Trent Reznor had to start acting like a whiny bitc....oh, sorry. I catch on to games kinda slow.
Um...Nein sex for that guy! hahahaha...
NIN rocks.
You should have kicked his ass and took his money.
LIke an Animal.
I would have dashed away on my ten speed.
Did you fall in front of a seven-ELEVEN?
Did this happen during the TWELVE days before Christmas?
I'm breaking the trend...who makes breakfast a first date?
FOURTEEN-year-olds. After church. It was more of a brunch thing, I'm sure.
Fifteen, by Taylor Swift plays softly on the radio, while I sit and wonder why someone would venture into the aftermath of an ice storm for breakfast with a stranger?
There were SIX TEENs in the cafe with them, who probably should have been in school. They laughed at the situation too.
Tools
One particularly precocious girl was reading a Seventeen magazine.
o_O That bitch! I bet she 'ate teen' drama up like mad. Those magazines are filled with it!
i had nine teens at my bar mitzvah.
20 years ago, that would have been funny, now i have fallen, and I can't get up
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